


His Ring, His Heart

by Kca1516



Series: Wintersoldier Steve [5]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Arguing, But very slight - Freeform, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Insecure Steve, Insecure Steve Rogers, Insecure Tony, Insecure Tony Stark, Light Angst, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Misunderstandings, Self-Doubt, Steve Rogers as the Winter Soldier
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-04
Updated: 2018-09-04
Packaged: 2019-07-07 00:12:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15896979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kca1516/pseuds/Kca1516
Summary: As by request:Steve wants to propose to Tony, but is afraid he wil be rejectedWhat actually was written:Steve wants to propose to Tony, Tony thinks Steve wants to break up with him, self doubt from both sides but you see more of it from SteveSorry





	His Ring, His Heart

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LunaDelVille](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LunaDelVille/gifts).



> For @LunaDelVille after literally just looking over your request i think i did a better job then i origanally said in the summary it still kind if went sideways from the prompt and for that im sorry I hope you can still enjoy whatever the fuck i wrote...i tried (edit: i figured out how to gift things to ppl so imma get on that)

 

 

Steve paced anxiously outside the bedroom he shared with Tony.

He had kept his cool throughout the entire process.

He hadn’t freaked out when the thought first entered into his head, or when he brought the idea up to Bucky. Hell, he didn’t even panic when he physically had the ring in his possession. But, now? Now that the man he was going to propose to was on the other side of that door, and the time had finally come for Steve to pop the question?

Even the palm of his mechanical hand was sweating.

He had done a good job of keeping the secret under wraps, and away from Tony’s all knowing ears. The Avengers had helped him keep the man busy so he didn’t notice Steve’s absent as often.

It was a good plan, Tony hadn’t seemed to realize anything was amiss. 

Maybe that's why the super soldier hadn’t been nervous all this time. He didn’t have Tony’s physical presence around him twenty-four seven to remind him of what he was going to do. And how it might break or make their relationship.

But, damn, Steve had missed Tony. He missed seeing the man’s sleepy face in the morning trying to make coffee. He missed how Tony would lean against him at random intervals throughout the day, solely to know that Steve was there, and not leaving any time soon. He missed the feel of Tony’s body under his, writhing in pleasure. He missed the man’s smell, and the way his nose crinkled, and the dark brown of his eyes...and Steve wanted to  _ marry _ him.

The nerves seemed to disappear from Steve’s body as the thoughts raced through his head. All of those reasons, and more, were why Steve loved Tony Stark. Why he wanted the man on his arm forever. Tony was his, and he wanted the world to know it. He wanted to shout it from the rooftops and whisper it in the dead of night.

Tony Stark was his person, even if they never got married that would still be true. Steve smiled, feeling a confidence spread through him. He was about to marry the shit out of Tony Stark.

With a tentative hope giving him the courage he needed, the super soldier stepped through the door, determination in his stride.

 

“Tony, I need to tell you something-”

 

But, determination would only get him so far.

Tony Stark lay in the center of their bed, a bottle of whiskey held limply in his hand. The covers were strewn across the floor, and the genius was covered in nothing but boxers Steve was almost positive were his. Something was very wrong.

Tony had stopped drinking excessively a long time ago. Whatever had made him relapse was serious.

The moonlight from the window caressed Tony’s skin in a way that was almost unfair considering the miserable look on the man’s face.

 

“Don’t,” Tony croaked, not able to look Steve in the eyes. He took another swig from the bottle before putting it on the nightstand, “Just don’t. I already know what you’re going to say.”

A hand seemed to take hold of Steve’s heart and squeeze until he was sure it had stopped beating all together.

How did Tony find out? Worse, had this been the reason Tony hit the bottle? All of a sudden the ring in his pocket seemed so much heavier. 

 

“I-I don’t know what to do,” Steve finally managed to say, the words sour in his mouth. A hole in his heart. He remembered saying those words in the beginning. When he was still uncertain on what was real and what wasn’t. Tony always knew what to say to make everything ok again. But, this time Tony was silent. And, it felt as if the floor had fallen out from under him.

 

“It’s whatever babe-Steve. I never expected you to stay for as long as you did, anyway. In fact, I’m surprised you were able to put up with me for so long. No one’s managed it before,” Tony said, getting up from the bed. There was a dark humor in his voice that Steve had heard so many times before. That he hated every time it made an appearance. It was the voice he used to convince himself he was worthless. The voice he used to push people away. And, now Steve was confused. Because it didn’t sound like Tony knew what he had wanted to say at  _ all _ .

The super soldier grabbed Tony’s hand and twisted him around. The smell of alcohol was sharp on the man’s breath, but the clearity in his eyes said he wasn’t as drunk as he’d like to be. Steve winced.

 

“Tony, I’m-”

 

But once again the words died in his mouth. Tears. Tears had started streaming down Tony’s face. They sparkled cruelly in light of what they represented. Horrified at how hurt Tony truly was, Steve raised his shaking hand automatically to wipe the wetness away from Tony’s flushed cheeks. He specifically used his metal hand, remembering a night not long ago when Tony said it soothed him.

The genius found himself leaning into the touch, getting lost in the feel of the man he loved so much before reality came back to punch him in the gut. Tony flinched out of Steve’s reach.

 

The super soldier pulled back immediately.

 

How many people before Tony had flinched at his touch? How many people before Tony had associated Steve’s touch with violence? How could he have possibly thought Tony enjoyed the touch when Steve himself hated it.

Tony’s eyes scanned the room in a desperate need to escape. Steve stood before him, no longer sure he was capable of stopping him.

 

“I guess...I guess I’ll go then,” Steve forced the words from his mouth, and turned his back on the man he loved. There was a terrible realization, that if he walked away he’d never have Tony again. He would never hold, or kiss, or touch Tony one last time. And the worst part was, he still wasn’t quite sure why. He didn’t know what he did to cause this. 

And, there was still a goddamn ring in his pocket.

Right as he was about to reach for the door handle (he had been walking slowly in hopes Tony called him back) he reached into his pocket and held the ring box in his hand. Part of him wanted to crush it and scream at what had become of one of the supposed best days of his life. But, he couldn't. Not now that it represented so much. That ring was Steve’s heart, and it would always belong to Tony. With a deep, mortifying breath, the super soldier pulled the velvet box out of his pocket and placed it on the dresser.

His hand was shaking so hard he didn’t think he would be able to let go. But, the box hit the surface with a clatter, and there was no reason left for Steve to stay. 

The super soldier shook, the need to run vibrating through him. He didn’t ignore it. Steve pulled open the door, needing to get out of the suffocating room before he made an even bigger fool of himself.

But, a broken voice called him back. Like a siren that Steve could never resist.

 

“What is that?” Tony said, something like fear in his voice.

Steve knew he should walk away. He had already humiliated himself enough for one day, and couldn't bare it if the man he loved threw it back in his face. But, his heart urged him to stay. It was impossible for him to have made up the love they shared. And, part of him knew something was wrong. There had been a mistake. This was not how their story ended.

Steve didn’t bother turning around, hand still on the door handle when he answered, “It’s a ring.”

What he really meant to say was that was his heart. His heart that belonged to Tony, he just hoped the genius could read between the lines.

 

“What-what do you mean?” Tony stuttered. And wasn’t that just cruel. But, Steve couldn’t seem to leave like he knew he should.

The super soldier stalked back into the room, something like fear and anger warping in the pit of his stomach, “What do you think it means Stark? Aren’t you the genius? It’s a wedding ring. Why? Because I was stupid enough to think you might actually love me as much as I loved you. But, who could love me, right? A mentally fucked up ex-assassin with an arm made of metal.”

It was the wrong thing to do, get mad. He could already see Tony building his walls up, and coiling into himself like a snake prepared to strike. But, damn it felt good to get mad and be honest. Let his emotions take control even if it destroyed him later.

 

“Don’t you dare turn this on me, Steve,” Tony said, bottom lip curling in the way it did when he was furious, “Don’t act as if I didn’t-fuck, don’t love you. You’re the one who abandoned me. You’re the one who turned your back on me. This entire mess could have been avoided if you had just talked to me, oh I forgot you couldn’t. You were to busy avoiding me like the plague.”

 

Now Steve was actually confused, but a challenge was a challenge, and he wasn't losing this one. Not when he had done nothing wrong.

 

“You wanted me to talk to you? You’re a fucking hypocrite Stark. Whenever something’s wrong you hide away and let your problems fester and rot until there’s nothing left to fix when you come back up for air. Not because the problem went away but because you ignored it for so long the people in your life were sick of your shit and left.”

 

Tony turned pale at that, and Steve almost felt bad if he knew Tony wasn’t about to respond with something twice as vicious.

 

“You can blame this on me all you want Steve, but you know the truth. You know the only reason this is happening right now is because you ran out on me. You’re the one who ruined this Steve. This time it’s on you, and you can’t handle that. You play the ‘poor me’ card all the time, but this time it’s not working because you fucked up. You ignored me for  _ two weeks _ .”

Tony had said that multiple times in the argument, and Steve hadn’t known what he meant by it...until now.

The past two weeks that he had been trying to find a ring for Tony, he had been absent in the relationship. But, he had filled all the time they were normally together by asking their friends to keep Tony busy so he wouldn’t notice. Steve was an idiot, Tony always noticed. He just pretended he didn’t until it ate him up inside and finally lashed out like this.

The anger seemed to drain from Steve’s body. There was only one way he could fix this, if it was fixable at all.

 

“Marry me,” Steve said, catching Tony by surprise.

 

The genius stood with his arms folded across his chest and a scowl still on his face. Steve was almost positive he was going to be rejected, again, this time for an actual reason.

But, Tony was always full of surprises.

 

“What?” The genius snapped out, trying not to let on how confused he was. Anger shown brightly in his eyes, but it was slowly dying away as his curiosity took hold.

 

“Just...marry me,” Steve said, no longer caring what was said next. If this was the last straw that broke their relationship so be it. There was something Steve needed to say, and damn it he’d say it.

 

“Marry me because there is no one i’d rather fight with. Marry me because there’s no one i’d rather laugh, love, and cry with. Marry me because the thought of not having you in my life is worse then any hell they could come up with. Fuck it all, and marry me.”

Tony’s lip started to tremble as a result of Steve’s words, and his arms came down to rest at his sides, “If you love me so much, why is this the first time i’ve had a conversation with you in two weeks? Hell, you haven’t been around long enough to say hi to me. You’re always hiding away somewhere, or going out. I love you, but if our relationship is apparently so unstable I-I can’t marry-”

Steve was already proving Tony wrong before he could dare to say the words the super soldier couldn’t bare to hear.

 

The ring.

 

Steve spun around and grabbed the box from the dresser, desperately opening it before Tony could make his final decision. The super soldier sunk down on both knees, opening the box to reveal the treasure inside. It was a simple silver band from the outside, what shown about Steve’s ring was what was on the inside. Engraved on the inner part of the ring were the words ‘If you need me, I’ll be there’.

It was why it had taken so long for Steve to get the ring. Not many jewelers were able to fit in the inscription that Steve wanted.

 

“I wasn’t ignoring you, doll,” Steve said, taking advantage of Tony’s stunned silence, “Every day I would go out with Bucky to jewelry stores to try and find the perfect ring. I stuck the rest of our friends on you to try and keep you from noticing...but.”

And, then there were tears.

This was the most Steve thought he had ever seen Tony cry before, for a million different reasons as well. Anger, sadness, what he hoped now was happiness. He wanted to wrap the genius in his arms and reassure him that what he had said was simply out of anger and heartbreak, and no matter what, Tony was loved. So unbelievably loved. Steve would never leave him, or try to break up with him. It was the last thing on earth he wanted to do.

 

“Marry me,” he said one last time, “please?”

 

Tony’s eyes met his. For once, his emotions were splayed across his face. Readable for anyone to see. Tony was sad, and happy, and scared. So scared that he would mess things up between them, like what almost happened today except worse. He was scared he would push Steve to the limit until the super soldier left for good. He was scared he might break and blow away like dust in the wind. And Steve wondered if that fear would be too much for him to overcome.

 

“Of course. Steve, of course i’ll marry you. I knew the answer to that question the moment I saw that stupid, wonderful ring.”

 

But, he knew Tony wouldn’t let fear rule him, not anymore. And as Steve got up off the floor and pulled his fiancée close to him, he knew something else too.

They would be ok. They would live through all the shit the world decided to throw at them, and they’d do it together.

**Author's Note:**

> As said at the end of all my winter soldier steve fics, if you have a request you want filled in this universe leave a comment.
> 
> If you already have left a comment, but your fic is not up yet it is coming I promise i wont forget any of you
> 
> Tysm for reading and i will see you in the next chapter!


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